Positive’s short direct stack (from PU101)
For anyone who wants to use a direct opener, here’s a short stack, somewhat similar to what I use in field. This isn’t super-intense movie moment style direct. In a nutshell, it is going in with a sincere compliment in a very relaxed manner, and transitioning to rapport almost immediately.
Opener:
Guy: Hey, I saw you across the road, and I had to tell you, you look incredibly cute! Gal: Thank you!
Now, you can pretty much assume attraction, because you can be pretty damn sure that very few guys have the balls to be that direct. So you move into rapport. One thing you DO NOT want to talk about (at least initially) is where she is going or what she is doing (credit Alchemist) because it reminds her of her present reality. Instead, you want to pull her into YOUR reality.
Guy: It’s such a beautiful day outside. You know what I love about SF? Being able to look up and see bright blue skies and feel the sun on your face. What do you like about SF? Gal: Yeah, I love the weather here. blah blah blah
At this point, she isn’t thinking of the clothes she was buying, or where she was going, or what she about to do. You’ve pulled her into thinking about the moment and the beauty of the SF spring.
Next, you want to build an emotional connection with her. So you find out where she’s from, and what are you passionate about. You also want to open yourself and volunteer information. Don’t wait for her to ask you stuff. Tell her about you. Remember, the man leads.
Simple topics to talk about:
- where are you from and why did you decide to move here? (my default)
- what are you really passionate about?
- if you didn’t have to worry about money, what would you do?
- what’s the coolest thing that has happened to you in the last day/month/year
For each topic, you want to go DEEP about what makes her tick. You want to share yourself, you want her to get to know you. Here’s an example from one of my recent sets:
Guy: So, if you didn’t have to worry about money, what would you do? Gal: I’d be a nurse. Guy: Wow! My grandma was a nurse during World War 2 (true) and she told us all these stories about how she’d treat soldiers with all kinds of wounds, and the best reward she ever got was when the soldiers left the hospital and smiled at her as they walked out (I made this up). In fact, she told me about this army captain that came in with both his legs blown off, and he was so sad by the loss of his legs. She was assigned to him and blah blah blah… And one day, he was ready to leave the hospital. He came up to her in his wheelchair, held her hand, and said, “Thank you for everything. You are such an inspiration to me to continue my life. I’ll never forget you.” And right there, my grandma started crying, and she just knew that she was in the right field. etc
After you feel that you have a good emotional connection, you want to bring it back to the surface, talk about hobbies (eg what you do during the week) and food. You talk about your week because that is important info when arranging for a day2. And food is a really nice topic because errr… because I like food. 
Humor… Hmm… There is some debate in the community on the use of humor during the rapport stage. Here’s my take (mostly “borrowed” from Lance). I use it sparingly. I always want to remind her that I am a cool fun guy, and what better way than to sprinkle in little bits of humor here and there. However, you have to be really careful when you use humor. You can (should?) use humor when the topic is a little lighter. But you do NOT want to make any jokes in response to anything that she shares with you that is deep. That will make her feel rejected (I’m opening up to you and you’re making a joke out of it?!). And the humor I’m talking about here isn’t the C+F ball busting sort of humor you use in the attraction phase. It’s a teasing sort of humor, like what you would do with your girlfriend.
Eg: Guy: What are you really passionate about? Gal: I like rock climbing. Guy: Cool. You look like the kinda girl who likes to do it without protection. wink
Take it into deep rapport. Bring it back to the surface and do wide rapport. Sprinkle in some humor when appropriate. Repeat.
Next, you want to arrange a day2. You did talk about logistics right? If so, the day2 close should flow fairly easily. You’ve done your required reading, so you already know how to set up a solid day2. Erm… you DID do the reading right?After getting the day2 close, you want to KEEP TALKING TO HER for another 5-10 minutes. You do not want to be the guy who gets her number and immediately leaves (credit Shanghai). If you do that, she will feel that you only wanted to talk to her to get her number, and she will feel like just another entry in your phonebook.
Finally, eject… Eject in a classy manner. “It was great meeting you, and I’m glad we had this conversation”. Give her a hug. Give her a kiss (if possible). Then leave. Congratulations! You’ve just had a wonderful 15-30 minute conversation!
Positive
